On the way to church this morning, I got a call from C, a guy I met yesterday while handing out lunch bags, and who lives in a homeless camp near where we were handing them out. He met a single Mom who was looking for housing. I went by after church, and he had met several others during the 2 hours since our initial conversation! When I arrived, there was a line of folks wanting to know if we were handing out the lunch bags. I talked to each of them for about 15 minutes, getting their contact information, learning a bit about them and their circumstance and finding out what their long term goals were, and what they have been doing to achieve them, and how we may be able to help.
As I was talking, Alex, the one I had come to visit with, waited very patiently. I took her to get a bite to eat so that I could give her all my attention and really get to know her and what her needs are. She has been desperately trying to find a home for her to come back to; however, was not having much luck. She has been staying in hotel rooms, which can be very expensive. The problem with hotel rooms is you never know from one day to the next if there will be enough funds for the next day, and the next, and on and on. It’s a cycle that’s very hard to get out of as hotel rooms are expensive. For a hotel room that is $70/night (not including taxes), that comes to $2,100 a month! There may be a day to two, here and there, that they are on the street and not in a room due to the constant income needed to stay in one!
Apartments can be obtained for half that cost; however, if they have anything on their background check or if they don’t make a salary (verified through W-2 income) that is 3x the rent, they are declined. There is an application fee for each apartment of $25+, that is non-refundable to tell them they won’t rent to them. They end up stuck either in a hotel or on the street. The environment on the street is harsh, and many turn to alcohol or drugs to cope. There are shelters and programs that are there to help them, and most of them have been to and through them, had the few items that belonged to them stolen, been talked down to, judged, misunderstood and found the programs to be so rigid and structured that at some point, they were asked to leave. Many come with habits that are not the best for them, and although they want to change, it is very hard to do in a rigid and structured environment where they are told they can’t smoke (after smoking for years, they are expected to stop cold turkey), they have a curfew, which can be hard with some of the jobs who will hire them to do stock work in the early am or late pm hours, just to name a few.
Alex shared her path that led her to where she is. She has been to shelters and has been through programs. When she talks about her children, I see her face light up. She has a very deep love for them and wants to be able to provide for them and have them live with her. Right now, they are with a family member she trusts and who is providing a good, stable environment for them. She has held several jobs in the past and is willing to work, and we have shared employment resources with her. She does have someone in her life who she has known for many years, who has been a good friend to her and has had her back. I was able to talk to Reggie as well, to get to know him and his story. He recently broke his hand and it is wrapped in a cast. He has not been able to work with his broken hand, but is looking for work to help support them. We gave him some leads and while we were talking with Alex, he went up to one of the workers in the restaurant we were in and asked for a job application.
After talking with both Alex and Reggie, I got a better understanding of where they have been, where they are and where they would like to be. Housing takes time. The organizations that I would normally take them to were closed, and are closed tomorrow as well since it is a holiday. I reached out the the Community Collaboratives group, a messenger group that was created several years ago, and contains some amazing people who have knowledge of and access to local resources, and who are very active in the community, when someone is in need. I reached out to Janet with Advocacy to Alleviate Homelessness. I reached out on Facebook, and to some other groups I’m a part of. We brainstormed next steps – and immediate steps. They were in need of housing and the only option we had at the time was to get a tent, knowing that it is only temporary. I will meet her on Wednesday at Oak City Cares and Triangle Family Services to start the process of getting back on her feet. The tent will give her some time to prepare her for her next step towards stable housing and getting her children back.
After several texts, emails, messenger texts and searching, Janet came with blankets and pillows. A member of Green Pines Baptist Church reached out for assistance with purchasing a tent, air mattress and hand pump, which we are so grateful for! The community collaborative group sent several resources that we will check out on Wednesday. We had one of the other ladies who we have worked with and who is in an apartment (and in need of housing at the end of this month), offer to let her come stay with her for a few days. We had one of the other camps we have come to know offer one of their tents as one of the members of their camp is out of town for work for a few weeks. It was so heartwarming watching everyone come together to help this Mom! She felt all the love and had the biggest smile as we left with the tent. It is not ideally where she wants to be; however, she is very happy with it as she felt all the love that went into getting her to that step and does not feel all alone in this anymore.
By the time we got everything to where she would be staying, it was getting dark. Although she had help with C from the camp, it was too much with the darkness and Reggie’s broken hand to get the tent put up. C said he would let them stay in his tent tonight and he would sleep outside. They will work on getting the tent up in the morning. Again, although it is not ideal as I hate that C is going to sleep outside as cold as it is, I am grateful for his heart in wanting to make sure she had a warmer place to sleep tonight.
As I head off to bed tonight, I am very grateful to have witnessed such an awesome community come together to help this Mom, surrounding her with an abundance of love and support that allowed her to take the first step towards living the life she has wanted for a very long time!
* Names and pictures were used with permission